Watching over you !

We were at the hospital 2 weeks ago when I was down with high fever. The air conditioning in the waiting room was too cold for me. Even the warmest spot of the room had me shivering. I decided to step outside the room. That way the summer breeze would keep me warm while I waited for my turn. Joanna was content playing a game on the phone.

After a while, Lloyd arose to clarify some concern at the reception. I watched through the glass pane on the door, as he stepped away. Hardly a moment later, Joanna turned and realized that both of us were nowhere to be seen. She immediately rose from her seat and frantically looked around. Though I could see her through the glass pane on the door, she couldn't see me.I quickly opened the door, stepped into the waiting room. Relief flooded her face. I reassured her that I was watching her and she was not alone.

I heard myself say," I am watching you Joanna from outside the door. You carry on playing." I had barely heard my mouth speak those words, when a still small voice spoke straight to my heart. "I am watching over you too, my child. I never let go." The words in Psalm 121 echoed in my heart - "The protector of Israel neither slumbers nor sleeps, The Lord watches over you". The voice was undoubtedly the calm reassurance of God, for no other voice can speak peace to my soul.

                             
Frail as we parents are, we fail often in watching (both physically and spiritually) over our little ones. What peace and joy to rest in the shadow of the One who watches over us all. The Father up above watches you and me with love.

Will you forget me Mama ?

I was leaving to the UK last Thursday for the BSF conference. It was mine and Joanna's first time away from each other. I don't know who was more sad :-( . As the date grew closer for my departure, Joanna drew a lot of pictures -her main intent being to help Mama remember her. So she expressed to me all her love, tearful prayer for God to heal my cough, our happy home and gratitude for 'takeing' care of her through her drawings. I was sad at the thought of leaving her behind, though Lloyd, my parents, my sister n family and my brother were in Muscat to care for her. My heart was heavy with unshed tears at the pain of separation for a week. I kept verbally affirming my love for her. But she still needed to 'help Mama remember her' through her drawings. She advised me to look at her pictures everyday so that I wouldn't forget her !

How can I forget her ? For the life of me, I can't ! As a mother, I don't know if there is a moment that Joanna is not on my heart.

In Isaiah 49:15, God says
"Never! Can a mother forget her nursing child? Can she feel no love for the child she has borne? But even if that were possible, I would not forget you!

What a reminder of God's love for us ! A great assurance that even if a mother forgets her child, god will not forget us !

Freedom from Forgiveness Frustations

Does forgiveness frustrate you ? Have people been hurting you time and time again ? Do the repeated offenses torment you? When you are hurt by strangers and mere acquaintances you may dismiss the situation with the tide of time. What about family and loved ones, whom you cannot walk away from?

I have my share of forgiveness frustrations! Let me share a couple of thoughts that help treat my forgiveness struggle -

1) I am not perfect !! I may also be hurting people with my actions or words.
2) The extend of Gods forgiveness floors me - I still need God's mercy and forgiveness everyday.

Reminds me of the servant who had a huge debt that he could not repay.He begged the master's forgiveness to save him from the debtor's prison. The master forgave him. On returning home, he met a man who owed him a big debt . He who was shown mercy, was now merciless towards this man. He flogged him and put him in prison.

How like me! Though I may not flog a person physically, my thoughts do the flogging just the same. I have been forgiven so much by Jesus. I cherish the love and mercy that he has poured over my life. I need to extend what has been extended to me. I need to pour God's ever abounding love and mercy into the lives of people who need it from me. Heard it said that - Hurting people hurt people.

There is a question I ask the Lord when faced with the dilemma of forgiveness frustrations. How many times must I forgive this person, Lord? I thank God for Peter who was in the same boat of frustration. In Mathew chapter 18 verse 21-22, Peter asked Jesus whether forgiving seven times was good enough. Jesus replied to forgive seventy times seven. That's a whopping 490 instances of forgiveness. I heard it said that forgiveness would be a habit by then.

Forgive has a 'give' - the giving of Love ! This giving sets us free from forgiveness frustrations !